一场梦

原本很期待，很渴望。为了你，我花了许多精力与时间去达成。只差一步，我以为梦寐以求的时刻要到了。但就在那一瞬间，一切像泡沫般消失在空气中。从天堂般，霎那间跌入谷底。我满心欢喜地告诉你我能去了，可是你的回答却是一个又一个残酷的现实。原来一切只是说说而已。现实没有想像中地那么完美。

假象的破灭比原先的失落更加地残忍，跟叫人失望和心痛。与其这样，我宁可你什么都没提过。

这也宛如当头棒喝，惊醒了梦中人。一切只是一场梦。（昨晚我还真地梦见自己在上海，但今早醒来才赫然发现这只是一场梦。无论是梦里的梦，还是现实中的梦，都没了...）相信过了头，依赖过了头，爱过了头，受伤的只会是自己。 （看到之前写的日志，我觉得自己好白痴，那都是不切实际的想法。）


如今虽然没有你，我还是我自己。

靠山山倒，靠人人倒，靠自己最好。只能武装自己，把自己变得更坚强。

To go or not to go

??????????

I have been checking my mails like n-times…waiting for something that I can do…HAIZ.

Oh, something brightens up my day! Early in the morning, I received a card from SHANGHAI!!! HAHAHA! *sMilE* There are male and female version, so he sent me the female version. I took a picture of it with my HP so that I can carry it around! So happy!

“If your were to turn up one day, pls let me know.”

Awww…I would love to, but I don’t think I have $$ and time. =( Because to prevent myself from missing yew too much, I have made myself super busy. I just keep adding workload.
- Planning for Grant A Wish VIII
- Finding Sponsors for NUS Stage
- 3 tuition (Bangkit Road, Serangoon North, Kovan)
- L-derly Befrienders (Stepping down liao! ^^)
- Japanese (It’s really bad now. I didn’t put in effort, I shall pull up my socks)
- Internship (Nothing much to do yet)

Looks like I did a lot, but I think I didn’t really accomplish them…sub-standard work. The only thing that I’m really proud of is my tuition! I’m really proud of my tutees as they scored A’s for their subjects that I taught. Continue to Jia you!

Can angels grant my wish first? I want to go to shanghai, w/o spending much...(I shall find sponsorship for this...)

Jia You wing

I have been constantly encourage myself, I really need that. Be it for my internship, GAW, LB, Sponsorship, tuition. Very scare that I'll do badly for any of these. I know my limits...that's why I'm scare. Jia You...

listening to 平常心 now...am i gripping too tightly? But what am I grabbing actually? I also dunnoe...

I can do it

"I have to stay focus...I have tonnes of work to do." I have been telling myself that but my heart refuses to heed my advice. Chris said it will get easier after that...I know that also, but knowing and executing are different. I give myself until this weekend, period. Thanks for ppl who are missing me...like JX, Shu yi, Melissa....sisters and brothers...Thanks for all your concerns...I'll get used to it.

溫嵐-刺蝟


I hate to be so weak. ARGH. I feel so useless. I shall train myself again!
To-do list:
1) Do my intern job well, learn more things from society, from our surrounding. Be street smart.
2) NUS Stage Sponsorship. I haven't really get things done and it's really bad. REALLY BAD.
3) Japanese. I haven't been studying my Japanese. My standard is dropping. I need to rekindle my passion.
4) After watching "lord of study", I'm passionate to teach my tutee well. I shall put in more effort to pull up their grades.
5) LB
6) *not confirmed yet, so can't disclose information*

6th, 7th, 8th, 10th and 11th with Yew

6th May. Yew's last paper

Yeah!! Finally I got to see Yew for the first time after 3 weeks!!! I decided to give him a surprise in school with my new hairstyle. ^^ I spotted his car in MPSH carpark and sat next to it for half an hour before I surprised him. But his reaction was..."eh, how did you come here?" not very hyper as usual...but I could sense that he was a bit surprised. =P I told him about my hair in excitement, but his response was, "早就应该这样了。" DON'T YOU KNOW WHAT IS PRAISING???!!! *box u*

After having our late dinner, we went to watch Ip Man 2. YES...IP MAN AGAIN! I really don't mind watching a good movie twice! hahahaha...Nice show!

7th May. Can't live w/o KTV

So happy to go KTV @ Teo Heng with kevin, huiting, christabel, victor and yew! I love singing K and I will get super super high. Kevin was giving me this skeptical look throughout the K session. =P It was also a birthday-cum-farewell party for Yew. I got him a Bakerzin's Foret Noir which he was a bit allegic to =(((. Also, think he was too exhausted to be high. haiz...poor thing who didn't sleep more than 4 hours for the past 3days.

8th May. Yew's Bday, Wing's advance Bday, Anniversay 3-in-1 Celebration

He was so confident that I would love my present that he pissed me off. "You will like your present more than I like mine." I almost wanted to cry on the spot after hearing tt. I spent so much time and effort doing the photo collage (18 of them) and he made this kind of comment. SO MEAN. Well, in the end he managed to 哄我.

We went Vivo's Sushi Tei (my treat) and IR sentosa. There's nothing much in IR...

At Casino, Universal Studio, Lake of Dream and Sushi Tei

At Hard Rock Hotel (Singapore)

Below is Caramel's present. Initially i put the Ipod inside the shoebag and lock it with a number lock. (see, tt's the price for pissing me off...u won't get your present. =P) Haha. just joking. Only after a series of clues before he managed to open the lock. hahhaa...

Next is Wing's 21st Bday present. Okay, he won...I had been searching a white filp phone like this in Singapore for ages. He really got it from Japan with the accessory that has my name engraved on it. AWWwww...So sweet! ^^

10th May, Stalker for the day.

Yup, today's mission was to stalk yew thong for the whole day (I brought my camera becos of this).

I reached his house at 8.50am...waited for him to get ready to go for his medical checkup. I was very happy when he said that he's not driving. Yeah! Let's take public transport! ^^

(Picture below) I took a few random photos on the MRT and caught him drinking in MRT!!!! o_O I brought my lappy to keep myself occupied while he did his checkup. Wow...tt's yew's X-ray film. Then, we had korean cuisine for lunch. Awesome.

Seriously feel like praising myself....So pretty. HAHAHA

After some shopping, we were tired and headed to his house. We took a nap at different timings and different beds. Then, had dinner together with his cousin, Elaine...den nothing much...den went to see doctor, i went home...ERM...really nothing much...

I bathed immediately after I reached home as I planned to stay overnight at the airport...(cos I dun want to pay the midnight fares and I scared that I overslept and missed yew's flight.)

11th May, Take Care Yew.

I reached Changi Airport T3 at 12.30am. I passed my time by watching Korean dramas, Cinderalla's Sister and Lord of Study, on iPod and laptop. Really upset when I realised that Yew was abt to leave in a few hours time... =(((

He reached airport at ard 6am, joined him and Auntie for breakfast. We didn't really talk much bcos his mother was there...He entered the transit at 7am... =(( so early...TAKE CARE! Hugs.

I called and chatted him after I boarded bus service 858. 舍不得，不舍得，舍得不。After the call, he sms-ed me. My hp was so clever to sort out the kind of sms based on the content! See the heart shape below...

Then the keypad lighted up with pink and white light...Awww....

Haiz...on my way back...only had the sun to warm my heart...

Miss yew...

FREE!!!!!!! Post Exam Celebration

yEAh!!!! I'm telling myself not to think of the result. even though I know it will be a chui one. My holidays are short, I only have 1 week before I start my internship at AB Sciex on 12 May. It's located in Woodlands. HAHAHA. I think it's possible for me to have lunch at home during lunch break. Haha.

After ytd's last paper, Shu Yi, Benjamin, Chee Yong, Lloyd and I ran off immediately after exam. We headed off to JU SHIN JUNG!!!! KOREAN BBQ!! It was a feast! We ordered Ginseng Chicken Soup and Seafood Pancake as ala-carte, thin sliced pork belly, marinated pork, marinated chicken for the BBQ. Around 7-8 side dishes came along with the BBQ. On top of these, there were a bowl of rice, pumpkin soup, seaweed soup, appetiser and drink for each of us. Within 15mins, our table was totally filled with food! The course ended with wheat tea and heart-shape watermelon! So sweet! ^^

Our estimation of the amount of food to be ordered was good ($28.4 each after GST n Service Charge). Everyone was full and we didn't waste food (well, got a bit here and there lah, cos no one ate the garlic...) It was great that we didn't had BBQ buffet ($29++), as the choices for ala-carte under BBQ buffet were very limited (Ginseng Chicken Soup and Seafood Pancake were not included) and I would feel that I was forced to eat a lot of meat.

Everything was awesome. The service was great, staff was very friendly. They offered me a clear plastic bag when entered the restaurant with my wet umbrella. Also, we didn't have to do the BBQ at all! They did it for us. ^^ Yummy.

Going with a group of friends was really fun with the mean boys, Lloyd and CY joking around, and poor shu yi was their victim. As Benjamin was sitting furthest from the BBQ pit, we were concerned whether he could reach the food, so we kept telling him, "吃咧！你拿得到吗？Benjamin, eat eat eat..." HAHAHA. Also, I won't forget the green chili incident that happened to shu yi...Awww...

After the sumptuous lunch, we head off to Plaza Sing for IP MAN!! (to CY it's I-P Man, to SY it's 叶问，永春 followed by a series of hand movements...-_-''')

We had a small drama before watching the big screen. Here's the story:

PART 1: The guys went to purchase the tickets first. According to them, when they was asking for the seat locations, the gal told them it was along the walkway. As they were not sure of the arrangement inside the theatre, whether are there different sections or just 1 single section, so they asked for more details. The gal attituded them and replied, it's along the walkway.

PART 2 (SY n I joined them): The total was $32.50 but the gal pronounced it as twenty-two fifty. The guys paid $52.50 and were expecting for the change. She just accepted the money, gave them the tickets and happily chitchat with her collegue. *Eh, the change leh?* So we asked for the change, the attitude gal denied that she was wrong, and said she calculated it with calculator. Then she said it was THIRTY-TWO FIFTY. (but even so, we should still get back $20) Then, she calculated once more and gave back $17.50 without apologising. CY and Lloyd were damn pissed by then.

CY: So how much is the total?

Gal: $32.50.

CY: We gave you $52.50. Press your calculator, we should get back $20.

Gal: *pressed calculator...Oh...FINALLY REALISED HER MISTAKE* Sorry. (not to mention in an attitude way, and gave us our change.)

Hello, we have 5 engineers here...

We wanted to complain that gal after Ip Man, but the show was super awesome that we decided to forgive that gal. HAHAHA. Ip Man rocks! We were clapping and cheering in the theater as if we were watching live.

Shu yi was totally in love with the show! ^^

After that only Shu yi and I con't with our shopping. ^^ Sad that I couldn't shop for long as I had Japanese class at 7.20pm.

Apparently, my application to change class was successful and and they allowed me to change to Sat's class. But even so, they still allowed me to attend ytd's lesson. And I got back my test paper, it was okay only. Hope that I can rekindle my passion for Japanese soon...